Saturday, August 9, 2014

Blaugust 9th: Compact Penis

Sometimes it's hard...

In high school the locker room was a place of self-judgment. Everybody was worried about their own privates. Do I just have a compact penis? If they ask, I'm a grower not a shower. Should I pull on it a bit to make it look bigger? Maybe I should glance at the competition? Is that gay? What if I get a boner? Is it big enough? I'm sure women have the same self-esteem issues in the locker room. They compare breasts sizes and labia. Sometimes they soap each other up and giggle. I'm sure of it.

Even though we leave the locker room behind as we leave school, we never leave the self-esteem issues behind. We might not worry so much about our genitals as we grow older, but we still fret over being good enough. Social networks are always pitting us against each other to see who has the biggest epeen. As an MMO gamer and a social condor, I'm always flashing my balls to the Internet. Good thing I'm older and they droop a lot more. They're like a half full burlap sack of potatoes.

Games are my penis on the Internet. I always want my game of choice to be big enough and popular. I want others to look out of the corner of their eyes and admire my game. I want them to play it too. Together we can have a fun orgy playing a game I love. Trust me, I get all sweaty when I get on VOIP.

The problem is, I worry if nobody wants to play with me. I want to be surrounded by the varsity cheerleaders stroking my ego. When they start getting bored of my game of choice I worry I've become flaccid and blew my wad of fun. That's when I frantically start jerking around different games hoping to be pleasured once again. This is when I become creepy and start running after the cheerleaders stroking my ego yelling,  "play with me! Don't leave me! Watch me! I'm a grower, not a shower!"

Sooner or later I find myself all alone in the locker room with my dick in my hand and my towel on the floor. Nobody wants to play with me. I have a choice to either, play with myself or put some damn pants on and grow up like everybody else. Unfortunately, pants constrict the baby factory.  There's a time when we all need to leave the locker room and not care, even if we're feeling naked and insecure about ourselves. There is a time to move on and not worry what other people think of us. It's hard, but letting go a bit will open more opportunities to meet people without worrying about our penis.

... being an MMO gamer and social butterfly.

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