Blaugust 2018!!!

The last time I wrote a blog post on this site was in April of 2015. If you don’t believe me just look at the post below this one.  I first started blogging back in 2008 when Warhammer Online was the new hot MMO. My first blog was called The Order of Destruction. All my blog posts at that time were done on an iPhone 1 with minimal editing. Over the years I had several blogs as I found new interests in the new HAWT MMO’s coming out. I lived on the hype of new MMOs and they all sucked. It seemed from 2008 to now, all MMOs just suck. I wish we could get out of this cycle of sucky MMOs trying to ride the coat-tails of WoW’s formula. Because I lost interest in sucky MMOs, I stopped blogging. Well, that is a lie. I mainly stopped blogging because people stopped reading words. Blogging has become a dinosaur when it comes to gaming information. If you are not streaming or Youtubing , you are shit. I discovered I was shit. As a blogger that doesn’t know how to do anything technological wise, I lost touch with the new kids on the block. Even though blogging is still a dinosaur and this post is just going to be lost in the void forever, I am still doing it to be a part of a larger movement. I joined Blaugust!

Blaugust is a bunch of old people that can’t let go of a dying media that decided to write a lot of crap during August. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing and I love the idea of Blaugust, but I doubt I am going to stay writing past August 31. I am just too much of an attention whore to waste my time not getting instant gratification. Personally, I would love to see blogging come back because I love writing and getting lots of attention. With my skills lacking in common sense, technology, and a personal filter I am unable to make any more excuses as to why I can’t do it, besides I am not pretty.  So, it appears you will only be able to read my crap for the month of August. When I say read I mean, I will only be able to read myself for the month of August. You see, I know nobody is going to read this so there is no need for me to be politically correct or give a shit what I am actually saying. If you’ve read this far please seek therapy.

What can you expect to not read from me in the month of Blaugust? Most likely I will talk about you and how much you suck. Oh, and I might talk about Warframe just a little bit. As you can see below, I have always loved Warframe and played the game. To this day I think Warframe is the only game I’ve played more than 600 hours on. Yeah I played a lot of WoW and Overwatch, but I do not think they come close to the amount of time I’ve spent in Warframe. I believe you are stupid for not playing it. I just had to add that to make sure you understood I don’t give a shit what you think and believe you should play Warframe more than any other game in this world. Let me give you a quick rundown as to why you should be playing Warframe. Because it is fun! There that was a painless list. I do play other game too, but it would not be fitting to talk about them in the same paragraph as Warframe. Here is my fake transition to the next paragraph I hope you are happy.

I started playing Guild Wars 2 again. I took a year or two off after Heart of Thorns sucked. In GW2’s defense, HoT did not technically suck it was just very hard on a person like me. You see, I’ve gotten trapped in a paper bag before and the maps in GW2 are big paper bags filled with my own personal hell. The most frustrating part of GW2 to me is the maps. I’ve spent hours looking for a hole to exit, which is hard for me because I have three kids. I don’t know how many hours I’ve spent crying in the shower because of the GW2 maps. When HoT came out and took the maps vertical, I didn’t leave the shower. Needless to say, I returned because of the mounts. The game now has mounts I can use to help me with my map phobia. Other than GW2 and Warframe, I don’t think I’ll be playing any other games for the next couple months. Even though I played WoW on and off for over 10 years, the new expansion coming out in August looks like it lacking anything I would ever be interested in.

I think I’ve written enough for myself. I will be writing more in the month of August and I hope you read it. I promise I will insult you more and write like I am on meth. If you like my writing please tell me. If you don’t like it, please shut the hell up and keep reading. If you still enjoy written words please read all the stuff people write for Blaugust. It is important we keep reading and not get dumbed down like the younger generation. Please support your local blogger!

PS. I didn’t edit this either because who gives a crap!

Blaugust 2018!!!

The last time I wrote a blog post on this site was in April of 2015. If you don’t believe me just look at the post below this one.  I first started blogging back in 2008 when Warhammer Online was the new hot MMO. My first blog was called The Order of Destruction. All my blog posts at that time were done on an iPhone 1 with minimal editing. Over the years I had several blogs as I found new interests in the new HAWT MMO’s coming out. I lived on the hype of new MMOs and they all sucked. It seemed from 2008 to now, all MMOs just suck. I wish we could get out of this cycle of sucky MMOs trying to ride the coat-tails of WoW’s formula. Because I lost interest in sucky MMOs, I stopped blogging. Well, that is a lie. I mainly stopped blogging because people stopped reading words. Blogging has become a dinosaur when it comes to gaming information. If you are not streaming or Youtubing , you are shit. I discovered I was shit. As a blogger that doesn’t know how to do anything technological wise, I lost touch with the new kids on the block. Even though blogging is still a dinosaur and this post is just going to be lost in the void forever, I am still doing it to be a part of a larger movement. I joined Blaugust!
Blaugust is a bunch of old people that can’t let go of a dying media that decided to write a lot of crap during August. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing and I love the idea of Blaugust, but I doubt I am going to stay writing past August 31. I am just too much of an attention whore to waste my time not getting instant gratification. Personally, I would love to see blogging come back because I love writing and getting lots of attention. With my skills lacking in common sense, technology, and a personal filter I am unable to make any more excuses as to why I can’t do it, besides I am not pretty.  So, it appears you will only be able to read my crap for the month of August. When I say read I mean, I will only be able to read myself for the month of August. You see, I know nobody is going to read this so there is no need for me to be politically correct or give a shit what I am actually saying. If you’ve read this far please seek therapy.
What can you expect to not read from me in the month of Blaugust? Most likely I will talk about you and how much you suck. Oh, and I might talk about Warframe just a little bit. As you can see below, I have always loved Warframe and played the game. To this day I think Warframe is the only game I’ve played more than 600 hours on. Yeah I played a lot of WoW and Overwatch, but I do not think they come close to the amount of time I’ve spent in Warframe. I believe you are stupid for not playing it. I just had to add that to make sure you understood I don’t give a shit what you think and believe you should play Warframe more than any other game in this world. Let me give you a quick rundown as to why you should be playing Warframe. Because it is fun! There that was a painless list. I do play other game too, but it would not be fitting to talk about them in the same paragraph as Warframe. Here is my fake transition to the next paragraph I hope you are happy.

I started playing Guild Wars 2 again. I took a year or two off after Heart of Thorns sucked. In GW2’s defense, HoT did not technically suck it was just very hard on a person like me. You see, I’ve gotten trapped in a paper bag before and the maps in GW2 are big paper bags filled with my own personal hell. The most frustrating part of GW2 to me is the maps. I’ve spent hours looking for a hole to exit, which is hard for me because I have three kids. I don’t know how many hours I’ve spent crying in the shower because of the GW2 maps. When HoT came out and took the maps vertical, I didn’t leave the shower. Needless to say, I returned because of the mounts. The game now has mounts I can use to help me with my map phobia. Other than GW2 and Warframe, I don’t think I’ll be playing any other games for the next couple months. Even though I played WoW on and off for over 10 years, the new expansion coming out in August looks like it lacking anything I would ever be interested in.

I think I’ve written enough for myself. I will be writing more in the month of August and I hope you read it. I promise I will insult you more and write like I am on meth. If you like my writing please tell me. If you don’t like it, please shut the hell up and keep reading. If you still enjoy written words please read all the stuff people write for Blaugust. It is important we keep reading and not get dumbed down like the younger generation. Please support your local blogger!

PS. I didn’t edit this either because who gives a crap!

Weekend Wrap-up

I had a great weekend playing games. Here is what I did:

WARFRAME -

Of course, I spent a good chunk of my weekend in Warframe. I'm always double fisting Warframe on the PS4 and PC. The great thing is, I don't have the same frames between the 2 systems. On the PS4 I play Frost Prime or Excalibur. On the PC I play Mesa, Nekros, Hydroid, Ember, Nyx, Rino, and 3 others I want to play but can't because the world is a cruel place. It's a long story I will bore you with.

So, every time you log in you get a reward. On the PC during day 1 and 2 there is a chance to get 20%, 50%, and a mythical 75% off of platinum, which costs real money to get. Platinum is used to buy stuff off the Warframe market. One of the things you have to use platinum for is warframe character slots. Initially you get 2 slots.  One for the starter warframe and the second for a warframe you make. All warframes bought off the market get their own slot so they do not take up your free slots. Anyways, I have 3 warframes I made last week that I need to buy slots for. Each slot costs 20 Plat. For 75 Plat it costs me $5. Even though that's really cheap I really want a big Plat purchase to get discounted Plat and some special mod cards. With a glorious 75% discount I can get the $200 package for only $50. With that I'd be set for life on the PC side. I know I sound like a whiney cheap ass, but yeah, I am.

The grunt of my weekend in Warframe was playing random groups with people I don't know. 99% of the time I play Warframe without anybody I know. The clan I'm in on PC consists of me mainly and the clan leader that logs in when I beg him. I'm ok with it though because I really don't mind playing with strangers. Over the past few months playing Warframe hardcore I've learned how to communicate better with strangers to get what I want. That is the only way to be successful playing a game like Warframe unless I want to join a large clan made up of people I don't know. It would be the same as what I'm doing now, but I wouldn't have my friends to play with when they decided to log in. I'm happy with how I'm playing the game now.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT -

There wasn't much WoW this weekend. The night I usually log in to raid I was busy with my family. Actually, I've felt less and less wanting to play WoW because my friends haven't had time to play. Unlike Warframe, my happiness in WoW hinges a lot on my friends happiness in WoW. WoW is a game to me where I love playing with people I know and chatting on VOIP. Without them, I stop logging in. It's just not the same without them.

PILLARS OF ETERNITY -

I've been having a blast with this game. I haven't played a whole lot because it requires a lot off attention. There is a ton of reading and like true old school RPGs, you need to be careful not to screw up your story. I usually play this in a large chunk, but only 1 chunk a weekend. This weekend I did about 3 hours and my brain was mush.

I'm playing a Ranger because I feel pet classes always add extra depth to RPGs. That and I die less. I did have to move my game from normal mode to easy. PoE is just so brutal at times. Even on easy mode the game is very hard. This is no Dragon Age Inquisition people! This is the real RPG deal.

DCUO -

I didn't play it this weekend, but I patched it up ready for the new Powers coming out today. I'm excited to play a Munitions power. I watched a little video explaining how the powers work, but not too much a out it. I want it to be a surprise when I play it today. Yeah... TODAY!! Well, unless me Warframe log in award is 75% off. I doubt it though, so I'm pretty sure I'll he playing DCUO tonight.

That's it for my Easter Weekend of gaming, how was yours?

#DAW2015: Digital Extremes - Warframe

I guess it wouldn't be right to not do a DAW post this year. About 6 years ago I started DAW to show developers we (gamers and bloggers) aren't all assholes all the time. When I thought of DAW I thought of Michael Jackson, Elton John, Lionel Richie, Stevie Wonder, Cyndie Lauper, Tina Turner, and all the other singers that joined together to help Africa in the 1980's. I wanted to bring bloggers, gamers, and developers together Bill and Ted style for 1 week.

Just like all great crusades, I realized it was pointless. I realized people only cared about the villains. If you think about all the great movies, historical icons, and any great story, what makes it great is the villains. When you think of World War 2 the first thing you think of is Hitler. When you think of comic books, you rattle off all the ones with the best villains. Anything that sticks in our minds as the best forms of entertainment always has an amazing villain attached to it. That is why we'll never see world peace and that is why DAW will never be great.

Giving up on my crusade to be the Pope of the gaming community, I decided to disappear this year. To become the martyr, which always makes a great story. I was expecting DAW to not happen this year. Well, it did! A couple cool catz took the reigns. They might not be Willy Nelson or Kenny Rogers, but damn, they're some great guys in my book. Thanks www.ihavetouchedthesky.blogspot.com (Rowan) and www.aggronaut.com (Belghast) for doing DAW this year. Sure, Africa still is overridden with death, disease, diabetes, distribution, discombobulation, dingleberries, and dysentery, but you've made me smile.

DIGITAL EXTREMES - WARFRAME

Now that I'm done with the formalities of kissing peer ass, I can kiss some developer bootayh.

I've had an account with Warframe for 1 year 9 months. Just last week Warframe turned 2 years old. Even though I've been a member of their community for almost the whole time the game has been out, I haven't played the game very much. About 2 months ago that all changed. I've been logging in daily for 2 months straight now. Not just on PC, but on PS4 too.

Since I've started logging daily, I've helped fund their free-to-play game through 4 accounts. Yes 4! I have an account on PS4 and PC, that's 2. 2 out of 3 of my kids play Warframe daily too, that's 4. Each account we've bought something. Not because we had to, but because I strongly believe in helping if I'm enjoying myself. Warframe has brought my family closer.

I understand a lot of people believe: if the game is free-to-play, I'm not spending a dime and I expect 110% effort from the developers. Even though I believe in funding the game, I do like free from time to time. My household has probably spent $200 on Warframe in the last 4 months. Every penny was worth it and I plan on spending more.

Right now I have 16 platinum (in game currency bought with real money) and it costs 20 platinum to buy a character slot. I've made 3 extra characters I don't have slots for. Sadly, I can't play them until I spend more real money or find a person that wants to buy something I have for platinum.

You see, everything in Warframe can be made, bought, and sold by players. Anything sold for real money on Warframe market is in the game to find. Even though I'm limited slots for characters and I need platinum to open those slots, I can find a sucker player to trade something I got in game for platinum. The problem is, nobody wants what I have... Jerks! I have 2 options to play those characters I built:

1. Pay real money now
2. Delete existing characters

Obviously, option 2 is very stupid because all characters I've acquired are amazing. So the last 2 weeks I've been playing the log in roulette wheel hoping to get a platinum discount. One very addicting thing about Warframe is the daily log in rewards. You can get some awesome stuff just by logging in. For me, I need to log in once every 2 days to get what I'm looking for. I want a 20, 50, or super duper awesome 75% off platinum award which is only in the 1 to 2 day log in window. I know it's sad I don't want to pay full price for my platinum, but damn dude I've already spent $200 on yo game brah!

That all said, I'm extremely addicted to Warframe. I love their game and I love their weekly live streams. Digital Extremes is a bunch of great Canadians. We all already knew that A! I would love to thank them for making an outstanding game and constantly changing it for the better over the past 2 years. Keep up the great work I love you all.

PS- If your next Prime Access is Ash Prime with Dread Prime and Hate Prime, I'm buying the $140 package without blinking a eye!

Hype Misunderstood

When I was younger I got my wife (now ex-wife) pregnant with our first child. I remember how excited we were to have a baby. For 9 months all we could do was talk about our plans for the baby and how great we are going to be as parents. We talked about our future in great detail. Not just 9 months later or the first few years, but a lifetime of plans together with our new baby.

Some of our plans were:

1. Be Super amazing parents and nurture our child every step of the way.

2. Teach our child together with the same rules and responsibilities.

3. Love our kid and each other.

4. Send him/her to the best collage in the world.

5. Have him/her do all the sports because we have superhuman genetics.

6. He/she should win the Nobel Peace award.

7. World peace... Definitely!

8. Best kid in the world without a doubt.

9. He/she is going to make us billions! BILLIONS!!

10. I'll be surprised if the baby doesn't come out speaking with a British accent holding a martini.

For 9 months we had a perfect life. Well, except when she was in a hormonal bitch-fit. Other than that though, life was perfect. We would walk around with birds singing our names and other women would line up to touch my penis wife's belly. Damn, when is somebody going to shake the real creator of this baby?

About 2 weeks over the due date we had our first baby. Our first of 3 sons. My wife was a total ass to me in the delivery room. There was blood everywhere. I needed sleep. Her vagina was a mess. What the hell happened to the martini? The whole birthing thing did not go as planned at all. It wasn't bad, but nothing could've prepared us for it. Not even stupid books or past experience of other people. Our baby was unique in his own way coming onto the world. Unique is not perfect.

Several years after our son was born and everything on our list of hopes and dreams was burned, we decided to try again. I remember standing naked over my wife after using her like a Chucky Cheese Skeetball machine thinking to myself, "this time, this time, I must have got it in the 500 hole!"

9 more months later, I realized my wife wasn't pulling her weight in the gene pool. That is the only way to explain the messed up coding our kids were coming out with. I knew it wasn't me. I did my job. I gave a 110%. My heart sunk and my marriage fell second to trying to fix the imperfections in my kids.

Third times a charm right? Wrong! No matter how much love you put into sex, it doesn't improve the sperm or egg quality in the end. No matter how much faith you put in your hopes and dreams, things we create have a life of their own. There is only so much you can control before it starts to control you. My 3rd son made me realize it was my fault. Yes I tried my hardest, my wife did too, we were super hyped each time, we believed they were going to be perfect, but life is never perfect.

Even though I love my kids dearly, I know their faults just like I have my own. My expectations of them was as expected from a new parent. We don't create life in hopes it's mediocre, average, or even slightly above average. We create life in hopes it's the best, better than all other life, and everyone will worship what we created. Even Superman can't live up to those expectations. Our hype is misunderstood by ourselves and by others. No wonder we always feel let down and depressed by it.

There are days I just sit with my kids and think about them and what I thought they were going to be like. I think about my list and how the only problem with it was me. The feeling of creating life is intoxicating. When I made the list I was drunk on my own life not the one I created. I don't ever regret being overly hyped about having children, it was the best feeling in the world. I regret feeling disappointed by the expectations of everybody else. I should've never sought their approval and loved my kids for who they were not who society expected them to be. To this day I believe my kids are perfectly who they want to be and that's perfectly ok with me. I will love them forever.

Project Scarybooster

Yesterday, I was sitting in my Dragon Bone computer chair thinking. I've had this Thorn in my side that's been causing me Sarrow if my memory serves me right. I'm not sure because I forgot. My chair didn't help me remember, but we know the Angry Chair pisses Alice off until she throws Dirt in my eyes. Enough with these Games of Thrones, somebody is bound to get hurt or worse. I know you're on the edge of your own seat waiting to find out what Project Scarybooster is...

PROJECT SCARYBOOSTER:

As I said before, I was pissed off sitting in my uncomfortable chair waiting to die when I thought of this idea. An idea so grand I can't pull it off. Ultimately, this idea is going to fail no matter what. Obviously, I don't want it to fail because if I did I wouldn't tell you so I could fail in my head. Deep down inside me I want to do something in my life that wins me praise from my daddy. I just need a hug before I die. Project Scarybooster is that hug I sorely need. You can help me... Maybe.

The other day a friend of mine wrote a post on Facebook about how the person in front of her bought her coffee at Starbucks. Without even knowing my friend a stranger was nice enough to buy her a cup of coffee not even knowing how much she spent. That type of thing has never happened to me, you know "pay it forward". It's a karma, soul massaging, act of kindness. Even if my friend was a mass murderer, she got a free cup of coffee. How would you feel buying a murderer a $5 cup of coffee? I know, chances are my friend isn't a murderer, but she could be.

Thinking about the succulent coffee my friend got for free pissed me off more. Why don't I ever get free shit? Why am I a loser? Why did my parents chain me to the basement wall and feed me dog food for 6 years? Then all the answers came crashing down on me, I'm selfish! I expect to be handed free stuff just because I'm naturally amazing. As I get older, I'm getting uglier and people don't lick my boots anymore. I need to change my ways and do something out of the kindness of my heart.

That's where Project Scarybooster comes in. For the next couple days, weeks or hours, I'm going to search for a person I don't know. A person I've never talked to before in my life. A person that has never heard of Scarybooster (which might be really hard), and buy a game for them.

I believe I'll go to heaven for this. No... Lol. I believe I'll make someone happy for a little bit. That's good enough for me. So, let Project Scarybooster begin...

Crowfall on Kickstarter

I'm a 40 year old gamer. I've lost all faith in games and their overly hyped communities. My beloved hobby is depressing.

The older I get, the more I feel like a hermit when it comes to gaming. Even though I love playing MMOs, I want less interaction with the community. I'm not sure if it's them or me. I just don't want to deal with the people that play these games anymore.

Last night I was in a raid and the main tank started cursing at the off-tank for pulling aggro. Not just F-bombs, but C, B, S, L, M, N, O, P-bombs. All in CAPS. Was he wrong to put the off-tank in his place? No not really. Was he wrong to use the Urban Dictionary to get his point across? Yup! Nobody cares anymore, though. The gaming community is filled with people that have no understanding of empathy because there are no repercussions. Gaming and the Internet are in a sad, sad state.

Yesterday, I backed a new MMO due out in 2017ish, Crowfall. If I'm so depressed about the gaming community why did I put a new MMO to my head loaded? Crowfall is a PvP-centric game after all and that brings ALL the hateful gamers out of the woodwork. Why would I put myself through this again? Is Crowfall that awesome I can forget the pain it will being? What is wrong with me?

Sadly, I've lost my faith in game communities. It's one of the main reasons my blogging has slowed down. I'm just not passionate about writing about a subject that brings me pain. I'm sick of not having faith in my hobby. I love writing and I love the friends I've made over the years through gaming. I needed a leap of faith. I need Crowfall to catch me.

Back when I first started blogging about MMOs, the community was amazing. There were jerks, but overall people were excited to share their fun stories through blog posts. 6ish years later, most of those positive bloggers are exactly where I'm at or have given up all faith. Every year I see more and more positive bloggers quitting to get away from the hate. For some reason hate sells better and those of us that refuse to hate on our blogs, we wave the White Flag. I'm not going to give up without a fight!

Recently, a great blogger and a person I consider a good friend (through Internet proximity), quit his main gaming blog. He is an amazing writer and had the best insight into gaming, but he was a good guy. The years of hate finally crushed his shoulders and he closed down his blog. I feel for him because I want to do the same thing everyday. I've stopped posting because I keep telling myself, "what's the point?" I haven't found one yet. I really don't think Crowfall is the answer, but it's worth a try.

Let's get this clear, I'm not a fan site and I doubt I'll post anything about Crowfall this year. Well, unless I make fun of them. I'm not the guy Crowfall wants on their link-love rounds. I'm not an ass kisser. I'm not going on their forums... Ever. I'm not going to write or draw fan fiction... Ever. Shoot, I don't even kniw anything about the game except you can blow shit up. I like that. So why Crowfall?

Like I said, I need faith back into gaming and Crowfall needed my -money- faith. I'm sick of feeling down about MMOs. My writing invigorates me and I need the "Crowfall's" in my life.

Test!

Test!

Going Down

I haven't blogged much lately because I've been studying for an important test I need to pass to be eligible for a promotion at work. It's a test to see how much I know how to lead others and manage resources. I failed... Twice.

The problem is, I think my answers are right. I cannot comprehend what I did wrong. Obviously, I'm too stupid to be a manager. This failure got me thinking about me. About how I've always failed at what I wanted to do with my life. Simply because I am not smart enough or talented enough to figure out how to pass. Yes, I'm very hard on myself, but it's because I care about everything I do. It seems I'll never be who I want to be no matter how much I seem to care.

When I was younger I wanted to be an artist. Looking back at my art and the excused I used when I quit drawing, I see I just sucked at art and it wasn't the fault of my blunt art teacher telling me my drawings sucked. I truly sucked at drawing.

I look at my 10 year old son's drawings and see a lot of myself in him. He sucks at drawing too, but I keep cheering him on not wanting to tell him he'll never be an artist. I tell him how to succeed, but like myself, he just is too lazy to practice at it enough to become good. He'd rather play video games or watch YouTube about video games. Like his dad.

A little bit later in life I wanted to work for NASA doing NASA stuff. Mainly, I wanted to stare at shit in the sky and get paid for it. I quickly learned you had to be smart for that and I would rather play Super Mario Bros on NES.

At about the same age as myself, my oldest son wanted to be a paleontologist. Lucky for him he learned quicker than I did and sat down in front of the PlayStation 3. As a high schooler, he has 0 aspirations to do anything except play games. Great dad I'm becoming.

I understand we all make our own choices and you have either the Victor or Victim mentality. For years I was a victim and I blamed my choices on everything except the real problem, myself. Looking at my past blog posts and social media writings I can see how much of a victim I saw myself as. Even now I feel like video games are my downfall. The hard truth I have to accept is, it is my own damn fault. I choose to play video games when I could've studied more for my test. Yes I studied a shitload for the test, but 52 hours spent playing Destiny, 100+ hours playing WoW, 50 hours in Wildstar, 50 in ESO, Warframe, ArcheAge, Firefall, ect ect ect...  Over 400 hours I spent playing games the past year I could of I used studying more.

I understand it's nice to take a break and relax, but I probably spent 40 to 1 playing games I stead of studying. If this promotion was so important, then why didn't I manage my time better? That's right, the test was on management and I failed it. Obvious things are obvious. Not to mention the countless hours on social media just being a total asshat to get attention when I could've be studying more.

I'd like to talk myself I'm going to change, but I really don't want to. I'd rather fuck off for the rest if my life getting paid for exactly what I deserve for my effort. Whatever makes me happy right? Too bad it doesn't make me happy that's why I completely play games like a drug to escape my failures. It seems like a catch 22, because I know I'm too stupid and lazy to do anything that would make me happy. Might as well ignore it and play more games.

What's funny in all this is this blog post. I've been told by a lot of people I'm a good writer. I wanted to be a writer at one time. I thought making a blog would help me do that, but over the past 6 years doing it I've discovered I'll never be one. I'm just too lazy for it. That and I misunderstood what I actually wanted out of a blog. I thought I would get feedback on my writing to help me become better at it. What I found was, nobody wants to read what I want to write. People just want to read drama and hate. Gamergate is the perfect example.

For over a month now this massive bitching about gamers and journalists have been going on. It's really pointless. Most gamers are middle to lower class, have an addiction, sees themselves as victims, and starves for attention. The game journalists are exactly the same. Gamergate might as well punch itself in the nuts every morning when it gets out of bed for all the good it's doing the community. Everyone just needs to realize exactly what I realized: you are all lazy, stupid, average, attention whores, addicted to games, and you'll never be what you dream of being because to always point the finger at others and not at yourself. All this gaming arguing is not doing anything, but proving we are all idiots. I am including myself in this because I know I'm no better.

In conclusion, this post is pointless. I'm going to go play a game now, so I can forget I will never be what I want to be.

Dear Samsung

Dear Samsung,

I preordered your Galaxy Note 4 and I’m having a difficult time waiting until October 17th. As I comb the internet, I see lots of famous Android websites with hands-on impressions. I feel sad I haven’t had the pleasure of caressing the new Note 4. What is even worse, I’ve been kicked out of my local Best Buy for hugging the Galaxy Note 3 and crying on the big, beautiful screen. My left ventricle is palpitating with sadness!

As a crazy consumer of electronics, I think I qualify for an early hands-on preview, but I understand I’m a nobody and it would not help your company’s public relations one bit. I understand there are millions, if not billions of people, that would love to touch a Galaxy Note 4 early. I understand it is only 16 days away and I could, theoretically, wait that long. Unfortunately, I could get hit by a bus in my living room at any time. Buses have been known to crash through houses randomly. Because my life depends on touching a Galaxy Note, I want to tell you a bit about myself to plead my case.
I grew up in the backwoods of New Hampshire. At times I had to hunt wild squirrels for dinner and use their fur to knit blankets to keep warm in the harsh winters. Back in those days there was no cable TV and I only owned a 13 inch black and white TV. I stayed up late at night just to watch Benny Hill or Jonny Carson. On Saturdays I watched Saturday Night Live on my tiny TV. I don’t even think Samsung was a company back then, but I still wanted a Galaxy Note 4. I could feel it in my young bones calling for me.

As I grew up and popped out 3 babies, I needed the best electronics to keep my sanity. I needed them! Over the years I’ve become a faithful costumer of Samsung. Currently I own a Samsung 59 inch plasma TV, a 22 inch Samsung monitor, a Samsung SSD, and a pair of sweat pants I wrote SAMSUNG on the butt in permanent marker. I even named my youngest child Sam after you. Shoot, I even named my 2 cats Sam and Sung. I tried to tattoo my wife’s butt with the word Samsung, because I can watch her ass all day long, but she wouldn’t let me. You see, I’m your number 1 fanatic!

Sadly, I know your company has nothing to gain from me previewing your product. Currently my Nexus 5 is broken and it is hard to write this post. If you didn’t know, I have been writing blog posts for 6 years from a mobile phone. I first started with the iPhone 1 when it first came out and only recently I moved to an Android device to write my posts. I now know I should’ve bought the Galaxy Note 3 last year instead of the Nexus 5. I would be writing this on it and praising your glory from a Note 3. Hindsight is 60/40 I guess.

Shoot, I would love to have a Note 3 while I waited for my 4! Imagine how fanatical I would be then? Why bother though, you have my love and last born child already.
At this point in my post I’m feeling anger. It is part of the grieving process and I can fully accept that. Why am I nobody to you? I’ve spent trillions of dollars (with the current emotional state I’m in I might exaggerate a wee bit) on your company and billions of hours thinking about how my life would of turned out if I just bought a Galaxy Note 3. All my friends told me to buy it, but I had to have the new hotness Google released. I’m so angry with myself now! I feel like throwing my Nexus to the Moon! Only if I bought that Note 3 my life wouldn’t be in such a discombobulated state. I’m starting to regret marrying my first wife now. Actually, I kind of do anyways. She’s a nice person and all and now that she is older she is not so pretty. I feel a bit better about getting a divorce now. Time hasn’t been good to her. I bet the Galaxy Note 3 is still as beautiful as the first day it came off the assembly line.

Part of my grieving process, I feel better now. I feel like I can go on even with this whole in my soul the size of a Note 3 or 4. As I wrap up my love letter to you I would like you to think about me, the little consumer blogger. I want you to send this to your boss in tears pleading my case. I want you to tell him/her how moved you were when you read this and how I could make your company sand out among the other phone companies. How your company has the heart to lend the little guy a Note 3 or 4 so he can praise you on the social networks. No other company would do this for the little blogger man. You would stand out and receive millions more love letters from desperate bloggers trying to make a name for themselves in such a cruel world. I can be your first.

I know it seems like I just have my grubby hands out looking for a freebie, but I’m not. I just want to borrow the Note 3 or 4 while I wait to pay for my 4 on October 17th. I want to show the world Samsung is the best phone company. All those other companies are heartless pigs, but Samsung is different! They love the little guy like me. It’s the holy thing to do in such depressing times.

So go now and show the bosses this post. Show them and DM me on Twitter! I’ll gladly give you my info and cats Sam and Sung. I love you Samsung!

Remember, when you go to bed at night holding your Note 3. As you put your Note on silent, tuck it in, and fluff its pillow, know I’m writing this on a Nexus 5 crying the whole time. Know I could contract Ebola and die before October 17th because I didn’t write this on a Note 3 or 4. I’m starting to feel faint now…/cough /cough /gasp…

5 Reasons Why World of Warcraft is The Best Game Ever Made.

I'm truly sick of people not playing WoW. I hate it when people get excited over the loss of subscribers. The only reason they hate it is because it is the best. It is the same exact reason why they hate rich people. I bet if you talk to a WoW hater, ask them what they think of Bill Gates, they'll rabidly hate him too. I'm sorry to tell you, but Bill Gates is rich because he is awesome and doesn't hate shit like a stupid poo poo head like you. You might want to take a look at your hateful life and acknowledge it's your own damn fault. Stop blaming others for your laziness and lack of taste for great video games.

Popularity breeds envy and jealousy, us smart people know this. Things are popular because they're the best. There had never been anything in history that was popular that didn't change the world. At the top of the list of things that has changed humanity is World of Warcraft. The last decade will go down in history has the decade we all said,  WoW!

Here are the top 5 things that makes WoW worthy of the history books and why it is the best game ever made. It's also, a list that proves people hate WoW because it's more important than their own lives.

5. 12 billion people have played it: Out of the 6 billion people on Earth, 12 billion have played WoW. That's right, that is 200% of the Earth's population that has played the game. How is that possible you might ask? Easy, let me explain for you dumber people. 50% of the world has tried WoW. 32% of those people own 4 accounts under aliases. 13% are registered as cat or dogs. 4% of the accounts are exotic animals. 21% of those accounts are dead people and some have been dead since the 1800's. 5% are account from people that don't even know they have an account and 95% of the active accounts are played daily by normal people. That only leaves an unknown percentage that are undecided.

4. In 2010 drug dealers were giving away free copies of WoW with every purchase of and illegal drug over an ounce: To me that proves WoW is the most popular game ever. If your drug dealer is willing to give away free copies, the game has to be the best game ever made. Also, 2010 marked the peak in WoW subscriptions and marked the worst time for reading Trade Chat. Why do you think [Anal]  chat became so popular during this time? That's right, prison folk were playing WoW. A little bit of Anal fun goes a long way in prison.

3. Dictionary changes were made because of WoW: As a direct influence of WoW, all dictionaries were changed to include the words- pwned, noob, newbie, nerfed, WoW, Tobold, ganked, and sammich. These words are used daily since 2004 and are now popular in other games that suck. These words would've never been thought of without the coming of WoW.

2. Prime Time TV: WoW is mentioned more on prime time TV than any other game ever made. Not only that, WoW has been featured in 100's of movies since it's coming. Once you make it to prime time and the big screen, you're considered more popular than Jesus. That leads me to number 1.

1. A WoW religion: In 2012 the first official World of Warcraft church was opened. The church is located in Westboro Kansas across the street from the Baptist Church. Services are held every Tuesday during realm maintenance time, as not to interfere with game time. Special services are held during rollback and hotfixes to pray for forgiveness.

In the Church of Warcraft or CoW, all walks of life and after life are welcome. The church is divided into 2 wings, Horde and Alliance. Staff are equipped with tazzers just in case someone gets too faction pridey. Please leave all weapons at home and Pandas are still not allowed at this time. Sorry, but there is no place for those animals in the CoW church. In the basement they named,  The CoW level, a buffet of goodies are served after the service. Extra loot bags are on sale just in case you want to take more than you can carry home. The CoW church is a profit only organization dedicated to building bigger communities even if nobody likes each other.

You see, WoW has proven itself to being the best game ever made. Again, the only reason people don't play it is because they hate the idea they might like something popular. They need to get rid of their rebel behavior and accept the fact WoW is amazing. You need to see a therapist and ask him/her what the hell is the matter with you. You need to stop bucking "The Man"  and play the best game ever made. I'm sorry, but you're just lamesauce (which was also added to the dictionary thanks to WoW).