Act 1: Pong

Now that Boomers are finally dying off, the rest of the world can relax and play their video games without being harassed. Video games are ere to say and have been a way of life for most of the population their whole lives. I do not remember a time I did not have a video game to look at or hold in my hands. When I came out of the flesh curtains of life, video games were there for me. I hit the stage on my opening act playing Pong.

Act 1: Pong

In November of 1972, Pong hit the streets as the first drug for the youth. While our parents were snorting cocaine, we were sitting in front of the TV watching a pixel ball bounce back and forth at our command. Unlike the drug of choice our parents were snorting, our drug was only intoxicating us with the sheer joy of entertainment. While our parents were naked in a rain gutter tripping balls, we were sitting in front of the TV with our balls protected by Underoos. Hulk Underoos to be exact.

Even though I wasn’t born yet and Pong only existed in a fake world I didn’t make real yet, the start of the video game revolution had begun. When I did finally eject from the mothership hyper-sleep chamber in 1976, Pong was waiting for me. I did not even wash the mother-sledge off before I had a controller slipping and sliding in my little mitts.

The year was 1978, and I was a two year old addicted to the sound of blip, blip, blop as the Pong ball bound franticly around our 19 inch TV screen. As a two year old, the screen was the size of a movie theater screen. I had to run from one side of the room to the other just to follow the Pong ball from paddle to paddle. My sister took joy in tripping me as I ran. If I fell too long she would unleash a violent fart in my face that smelt like last night’s dinner of liver and onions.  I did not care though! Life was cruel at my young age and my sister was just conditioning me for the battles I will need to fight in the future.

I never lost a Pong match that I can remember. Even at the young age of two, I was a gaming prodigy. I spun the Pong controller wheel with confidence and power. I used all my might and even my hips to get the ball moving. The gamma rays from my Hulk undies gave me superhuman strength and the power to do the impossible in Pong. To this day, I still have a pair of Hulk Underoos to give me that extra edge in life. My wife knows when I slip on the green meat suppressors, I am getting ready for an intensive battle in the video game world. She loves me for my room presents when I am wearing my battle gear. It is our thing…

As the years passed and more advanced games came out, I quickly forgot about Pong. The smell of liver and the visual barrage of Pong will be forever burned into my mind and senses.  A day does not go by that I do not think of my glory days of gaming. At the dirty age of 45, my mind is not what it used to be and I have not won a video game championship in years. I want to share my stories of pain, suffering, and glory while playing video games with you. Act 1 is the first installment of my Patreon video game history. Because my Patreon is new and I want you to know what to expect from me, this short story is open for all to see.

If you want to see or unsee more of this to help children that are battling terminal illnesses, take the time to check out my subscription tiers. As little as $1 can provide a child with a pacifier that could be a shield to deflect their siblings evil farts.

Thank you for reading and I hope to see you again. 

#BlaugustReborn Episode 2

Today I am taking it old school!

When I first started blogging I only did it on my iPhone 1, so I figured today would be a good day to post a blog post from my phone. Unlike other bloggers, I'm not going to give you tips (unless you like tips. Just the tips!) I'm just going to give you real life blogging experiences.

When I was growing up I had a lot of accidents. I can't count how many times I fell out of a tree or jumped face first in the dirt because Superman tricked me into thinking I could fly. There were times I had to go out in the rain in just my underwear to surf the church parking lot gutter waves. One time I was feeding a dog sandwich meat and he bit my hand. I found out later they had to put the dog down for biting me. These are things I have to live with for the rest of my life. I don't think I regret anything I did and  sure other people would've done things differently. What I did makes me who I am and I'm proud of who I've become.

As a blogger I've had several blogs that I had fall on their face, I deleted, or I just gave up on. For me blogging is a very passionate hobby I choose to emotionally invested in. When I feel the blog is no longer me, I move on. I fo not have any regrets about my blogging past. Over the past 10 years of blogging I've met some amazing people. Out of those people I've probably pissed them off at some point. I've lost good friends by just opening my mouth or joking around with them. I can't think of a single one of them I still do not consider friends even if they do not like me anymore. For me it is the experience and community that makes it all worth it. If I've said something to make you mad, I'm sorry but seriously get over it you are just wasting your own personal time and energy holding a grudge. I don't have time for that shit. That said, I hold no ill feelings towards anyone. Part about f being a online presence is to interact and understand everyone to s unique in their own way.

If you are a blogger and you receive a bad comment don't get upset just understand everyone was raised differently and what they say might not be a personal attack. If you did not breast feed off them as a baby, then you don't own them anything and they do not understand you the way you think you should be. You are who you are and should be proud no matter what. There is only one of you and nobody has ever experienced what you have. There is only one person you should try to impress everyday and that is you. Remember, I thought I could fly and broke my nose. I do not regret that and to this day I still have hopes I can fly someday. My tip as a blogger is simple, you do you for you.

Love you!
-Scarybooster

#Blaugust Day 1

It appears it is August 1st and it is time to do Blaugust. I haven’t been able to write very much on a blog over the past couple years because a couple reasons. I will go over those reasons so you can be officially bored by them. Here is a list of reasons I can’t be bothered to blog:

1. I went back to school to get an education- This month I will be 44 years old and I spent most of my life being a dumbass. When I was growing up I had a hard time reading and had a bit of dyslexia. What I remember the most was being in 4th grade trying to read “See Pug Run.” It wasn’t until I was in 10th grade that I read my first book ever. When you do not grow up reading and you struggle with it, you tend to avoid it as much as possible. The weird thing about me learning to read at a later age is, I grew to love writing. From 10th grade on I started writing as much as possible and enjoyed it because it was an outlet for my creativity. The only bad part about writing and not learning to read until a later age was, I had a hard time with grammar and spelling. It really didn’t stop me from writing for myself, but I was too shy to show anything I wrote to other people.  Towards the end of high school I was very passionate about writing, but knew I would never be good at it, so I went to college for a trade skill, architecture.

I only lasted a semester in college before I failed out of it. Architecture was extremely boring to me and I became more interested in a girl with giant breasts in my classes. They were mesmerizing! Besides the godly breasts, I learned a valuable lesson failing out of college, school was not for me. Before I left the school, my English teacher pulled me aside and told me I was in the wrong major anyways and should really think about learning English more because she really enjoyed my writing. It was an amazing complement after struggling with reading my whole life, but college would have to wait as I signed up for the military. I won’t bore you with the details of the next few years, but education was not something I pursued for the next 20 years. So what changed?

In my military job I was moving up and what I wanted to be in the military required me to have an associate degree. While getting the last few credits for my associate degree I decided I might as well use my military GI Bill and get a real degree. That is when I stopped blogging. In December 2015, I started going back to school for real and blogging had to wait. I now have my BA in Information Systems and I am currently pursuing my MS in Social Psychology with a focus in human factors and technology. That is the technical speak for, mentally analyzing how people interact through social media and other technology based social interaction. That means video games, blogs, YouTube and other stuff that draws our attention to our phones more than old-fashioned social interaction. I’m watching you!

2. With the little time I have to relax after getting my learn on, I play video games- The last thing I want to do after spending 10 hours at work and 3 hours a night doing school work is to sit at a computer writing a blog post for your ass. Sorry, but you are not really worth it to me. I’ve tried to want to write, but I’m just too mentally drained to think about it. This point really leads to the next couple points.

3. I freelance for MMORPG.com- Most of my writing efforts go into writing for MMORPG.com when I get time. I love that website and I’ve been reading them since they were founded in 1997. I think if I was a better writer of content creator, I would try to invents more time with them and be a part of their full-time staff. Right now, I really can’t bring anything to the table they would really need me for. I have some ideas, but with schooling, I am unable to commit the time to them. If you read any gaming website please read MMORPG.com because the staff there are the best people in the world.

4. Blogs are dying- Sorry, but it is true. There are still people that read blogs, but it is not what it once was 5-10 years ago. With streaming and YouTube it is easier and faster to listen to a person’s opinion than take the time to read it. It is very sad to me because I love writing and with my history with reading, I understand how important it is to keep reading. Kids these days will be hurting when they are adults if they stop reading and only turn to video media. That and social media like Twitter gives people a quick fix of information without reading fluff. I believe things like Blaugust are great because it brings more attention to written words and brings the blogging community together.

5. I don’t have a number 5- There is so much in this world today that just sucks the life out of us and saps our energy to be creative. Over the last year my family has been dealing with a sexist boss my wife had that used his position power to ruin our lives. She spoke up and told the truth about something illegal he did and he used his power to turn it all on her. In essence in less than a year we lost almost $30,000 a year in pay because of it. We are not hurting for money now, but we have had to reevaluate our spending habits and future life choices. The worst part is, my wife now lives in fear at her new work. Whenever she wants to make a suggestion or try to fix something she feels like she is going to get fired or people think she is stupid. It is horrible to constantly live in fear because somebody has abused their power. We’ve seen this a lot lately with the #MeToo movement. The people that dismiss the movement are the problem. They fear their strangle hold on their employees and women are in jeopardy. Nobody should have to live in fear daily for being who they are. I can’t fix it because I am a white male, but I can say something if I see it. The Bystander Effect is a serious problem in our society that needs to stop. The problem is people like me. The white middle class male is so comfortable sitting on top of our throne of easy, we are too afraid to do the right thing and speak up against this shit. Sadly, making my way around the internet I don’t see any white males speaking up. All I see is more and more feeling entitled to be racist, sexist, and all around dicks. On the subject of dicks, what really makes you think anybody wants to see yours in a direct message? NOBODY! These are the people that are running our corporations, our country, and our lives. The abuse of power needs to stop or as a country, we will fall behind the rest of the world. More than ever, we need to work as a whole society and treat each other with respect because right now, we look like idiots. We have to stop pitting against each other because of our race, sex, political stance, gender, or religion. It’s just sad we can’t get over this hump and stop treating each other like shit because it might hurt our ego by understanding we are not special individually. We are only special together.

Welcome to day 1 of Blaugust!

Blaugust 2018!!!

The last time I wrote a blog post on this site was in April of 2015. If you don’t believe me just look at the post below this one.  I first started blogging back in 2008 when Warhammer Online was the new hot MMO. My first blog was called The Order of Destruction. All my blog posts at that time were done on an iPhone 1 with minimal editing. Over the years I had several blogs as I found new interests in the new HAWT MMO’s coming out. I lived on the hype of new MMOs and they all sucked. It seemed from 2008 to now, all MMOs just suck. I wish we could get out of this cycle of sucky MMOs trying to ride the coat-tails of WoW’s formula. Because I lost interest in sucky MMOs, I stopped blogging. Well, that is a lie. I mainly stopped blogging because people stopped reading words. Blogging has become a dinosaur when it comes to gaming information. If you are not streaming or Youtubing , you are shit. I discovered I was shit. As a blogger that doesn’t know how to do anything technological wise, I lost touch with the new kids on the block. Even though blogging is still a dinosaur and this post is just going to be lost in the void forever, I am still doing it to be a part of a larger movement. I joined Blaugust!

Blaugust is a bunch of old people that can’t let go of a dying media that decided to write a lot of crap during August. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing and I love the idea of Blaugust, but I doubt I am going to stay writing past August 31. I am just too much of an attention whore to waste my time not getting instant gratification. Personally, I would love to see blogging come back because I love writing and getting lots of attention. With my skills lacking in common sense, technology, and a personal filter I am unable to make any more excuses as to why I can’t do it, besides I am not pretty.  So, it appears you will only be able to read my crap for the month of August. When I say read I mean, I will only be able to read myself for the month of August. You see, I know nobody is going to read this so there is no need for me to be politically correct or give a shit what I am actually saying. If you’ve read this far please seek therapy.

What can you expect to not read from me in the month of Blaugust? Most likely I will talk about you and how much you suck. Oh, and I might talk about Warframe just a little bit. As you can see below, I have always loved Warframe and played the game. To this day I think Warframe is the only game I’ve played more than 600 hours on. Yeah I played a lot of WoW and Overwatch, but I do not think they come close to the amount of time I’ve spent in Warframe. I believe you are stupid for not playing it. I just had to add that to make sure you understood I don’t give a shit what you think and believe you should play Warframe more than any other game in this world. Let me give you a quick rundown as to why you should be playing Warframe. Because it is fun! There that was a painless list. I do play other game too, but it would not be fitting to talk about them in the same paragraph as Warframe. Here is my fake transition to the next paragraph I hope you are happy.

I started playing Guild Wars 2 again. I took a year or two off after Heart of Thorns sucked. In GW2’s defense, HoT did not technically suck it was just very hard on a person like me. You see, I’ve gotten trapped in a paper bag before and the maps in GW2 are big paper bags filled with my own personal hell. The most frustrating part of GW2 to me is the maps. I’ve spent hours looking for a hole to exit, which is hard for me because I have three kids. I don’t know how many hours I’ve spent crying in the shower because of the GW2 maps. When HoT came out and took the maps vertical, I didn’t leave the shower. Needless to say, I returned because of the mounts. The game now has mounts I can use to help me with my map phobia. Other than GW2 and Warframe, I don’t think I’ll be playing any other games for the next couple months. Even though I played WoW on and off for over 10 years, the new expansion coming out in August looks like it lacking anything I would ever be interested in.

I think I’ve written enough for myself. I will be writing more in the month of August and I hope you read it. I promise I will insult you more and write like I am on meth. If you like my writing please tell me. If you don’t like it, please shut the hell up and keep reading. If you still enjoy written words please read all the stuff people write for Blaugust. It is important we keep reading and not get dumbed down like the younger generation. Please support your local blogger!

PS. I didn’t edit this either because who gives a crap!

Blaugust 2018!!!

The last time I wrote a blog post on this site was in April of 2015. If you don’t believe me just look at the post below this one.  I first started blogging back in 2008 when Warhammer Online was the new hot MMO. My first blog was called The Order of Destruction. All my blog posts at that time were done on an iPhone 1 with minimal editing. Over the years I had several blogs as I found new interests in the new HAWT MMO’s coming out. I lived on the hype of new MMOs and they all sucked. It seemed from 2008 to now, all MMOs just suck. I wish we could get out of this cycle of sucky MMOs trying to ride the coat-tails of WoW’s formula. Because I lost interest in sucky MMOs, I stopped blogging. Well, that is a lie. I mainly stopped blogging because people stopped reading words. Blogging has become a dinosaur when it comes to gaming information. If you are not streaming or Youtubing , you are shit. I discovered I was shit. As a blogger that doesn’t know how to do anything technological wise, I lost touch with the new kids on the block. Even though blogging is still a dinosaur and this post is just going to be lost in the void forever, I am still doing it to be a part of a larger movement. I joined Blaugust!
Blaugust is a bunch of old people that can’t let go of a dying media that decided to write a lot of crap during August. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing and I love the idea of Blaugust, but I doubt I am going to stay writing past August 31. I am just too much of an attention whore to waste my time not getting instant gratification. Personally, I would love to see blogging come back because I love writing and getting lots of attention. With my skills lacking in common sense, technology, and a personal filter I am unable to make any more excuses as to why I can’t do it, besides I am not pretty.  So, it appears you will only be able to read my crap for the month of August. When I say read I mean, I will only be able to read myself for the month of August. You see, I know nobody is going to read this so there is no need for me to be politically correct or give a shit what I am actually saying. If you’ve read this far please seek therapy.
What can you expect to not read from me in the month of Blaugust? Most likely I will talk about you and how much you suck. Oh, and I might talk about Warframe just a little bit. As you can see below, I have always loved Warframe and played the game. To this day I think Warframe is the only game I’ve played more than 600 hours on. Yeah I played a lot of WoW and Overwatch, but I do not think they come close to the amount of time I’ve spent in Warframe. I believe you are stupid for not playing it. I just had to add that to make sure you understood I don’t give a shit what you think and believe you should play Warframe more than any other game in this world. Let me give you a quick rundown as to why you should be playing Warframe. Because it is fun! There that was a painless list. I do play other game too, but it would not be fitting to talk about them in the same paragraph as Warframe. Here is my fake transition to the next paragraph I hope you are happy.

I started playing Guild Wars 2 again. I took a year or two off after Heart of Thorns sucked. In GW2’s defense, HoT did not technically suck it was just very hard on a person like me. You see, I’ve gotten trapped in a paper bag before and the maps in GW2 are big paper bags filled with my own personal hell. The most frustrating part of GW2 to me is the maps. I’ve spent hours looking for a hole to exit, which is hard for me because I have three kids. I don’t know how many hours I’ve spent crying in the shower because of the GW2 maps. When HoT came out and took the maps vertical, I didn’t leave the shower. Needless to say, I returned because of the mounts. The game now has mounts I can use to help me with my map phobia. Other than GW2 and Warframe, I don’t think I’ll be playing any other games for the next couple months. Even though I played WoW on and off for over 10 years, the new expansion coming out in August looks like it lacking anything I would ever be interested in.

I think I’ve written enough for myself. I will be writing more in the month of August and I hope you read it. I promise I will insult you more and write like I am on meth. If you like my writing please tell me. If you don’t like it, please shut the hell up and keep reading. If you still enjoy written words please read all the stuff people write for Blaugust. It is important we keep reading and not get dumbed down like the younger generation. Please support your local blogger!

PS. I didn’t edit this either because who gives a crap!

Weekend Wrap-up

I had a great weekend playing games. Here is what I did:

WARFRAME -

Of course, I spent a good chunk of my weekend in Warframe. I'm always double fisting Warframe on the PS4 and PC. The great thing is, I don't have the same frames between the 2 systems. On the PS4 I play Frost Prime or Excalibur. On the PC I play Mesa, Nekros, Hydroid, Ember, Nyx, Rino, and 3 others I want to play but can't because the world is a cruel place. It's a long story I will bore you with.

So, every time you log in you get a reward. On the PC during day 1 and 2 there is a chance to get 20%, 50%, and a mythical 75% off of platinum, which costs real money to get. Platinum is used to buy stuff off the Warframe market. One of the things you have to use platinum for is warframe character slots. Initially you get 2 slots.  One for the starter warframe and the second for a warframe you make. All warframes bought off the market get their own slot so they do not take up your free slots. Anyways, I have 3 warframes I made last week that I need to buy slots for. Each slot costs 20 Plat. For 75 Plat it costs me $5. Even though that's really cheap I really want a big Plat purchase to get discounted Plat and some special mod cards. With a glorious 75% discount I can get the $200 package for only $50. With that I'd be set for life on the PC side. I know I sound like a whiney cheap ass, but yeah, I am.

The grunt of my weekend in Warframe was playing random groups with people I don't know. 99% of the time I play Warframe without anybody I know. The clan I'm in on PC consists of me mainly and the clan leader that logs in when I beg him. I'm ok with it though because I really don't mind playing with strangers. Over the past few months playing Warframe hardcore I've learned how to communicate better with strangers to get what I want. That is the only way to be successful playing a game like Warframe unless I want to join a large clan made up of people I don't know. It would be the same as what I'm doing now, but I wouldn't have my friends to play with when they decided to log in. I'm happy with how I'm playing the game now.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT -

There wasn't much WoW this weekend. The night I usually log in to raid I was busy with my family. Actually, I've felt less and less wanting to play WoW because my friends haven't had time to play. Unlike Warframe, my happiness in WoW hinges a lot on my friends happiness in WoW. WoW is a game to me where I love playing with people I know and chatting on VOIP. Without them, I stop logging in. It's just not the same without them.

PILLARS OF ETERNITY -

I've been having a blast with this game. I haven't played a whole lot because it requires a lot off attention. There is a ton of reading and like true old school RPGs, you need to be careful not to screw up your story. I usually play this in a large chunk, but only 1 chunk a weekend. This weekend I did about 3 hours and my brain was mush.

I'm playing a Ranger because I feel pet classes always add extra depth to RPGs. That and I die less. I did have to move my game from normal mode to easy. PoE is just so brutal at times. Even on easy mode the game is very hard. This is no Dragon Age Inquisition people! This is the real RPG deal.

DCUO -

I didn't play it this weekend, but I patched it up ready for the new Powers coming out today. I'm excited to play a Munitions power. I watched a little video explaining how the powers work, but not too much a out it. I want it to be a surprise when I play it today. Yeah... TODAY!! Well, unless me Warframe log in award is 75% off. I doubt it though, so I'm pretty sure I'll he playing DCUO tonight.

That's it for my Easter Weekend of gaming, how was yours?

#DAW2015: Digital Extremes - Warframe

I guess it wouldn't be right to not do a DAW post this year. About 6 years ago I started DAW to show developers we (gamers and bloggers) aren't all assholes all the time. When I thought of DAW I thought of Michael Jackson, Elton John, Lionel Richie, Stevie Wonder, Cyndie Lauper, Tina Turner, and all the other singers that joined together to help Africa in the 1980's. I wanted to bring bloggers, gamers, and developers together Bill and Ted style for 1 week.

Just like all great crusades, I realized it was pointless. I realized people only cared about the villains. If you think about all the great movies, historical icons, and any great story, what makes it great is the villains. When you think of World War 2 the first thing you think of is Hitler. When you think of comic books, you rattle off all the ones with the best villains. Anything that sticks in our minds as the best forms of entertainment always has an amazing villain attached to it. That is why we'll never see world peace and that is why DAW will never be great.

Giving up on my crusade to be the Pope of the gaming community, I decided to disappear this year. To become the martyr, which always makes a great story. I was expecting DAW to not happen this year. Well, it did! A couple cool catz took the reigns. They might not be Willy Nelson or Kenny Rogers, but damn, they're some great guys in my book. Thanks www.ihavetouchedthesky.blogspot.com (Rowan) and www.aggronaut.com (Belghast) for doing DAW this year. Sure, Africa still is overridden with death, disease, diabetes, distribution, discombobulation, dingleberries, and dysentery, but you've made me smile.

DIGITAL EXTREMES - WARFRAME

Now that I'm done with the formalities of kissing peer ass, I can kiss some developer bootayh.

I've had an account with Warframe for 1 year 9 months. Just last week Warframe turned 2 years old. Even though I've been a member of their community for almost the whole time the game has been out, I haven't played the game very much. About 2 months ago that all changed. I've been logging in daily for 2 months straight now. Not just on PC, but on PS4 too.

Since I've started logging daily, I've helped fund their free-to-play game through 4 accounts. Yes 4! I have an account on PS4 and PC, that's 2. 2 out of 3 of my kids play Warframe daily too, that's 4. Each account we've bought something. Not because we had to, but because I strongly believe in helping if I'm enjoying myself. Warframe has brought my family closer.

I understand a lot of people believe: if the game is free-to-play, I'm not spending a dime and I expect 110% effort from the developers. Even though I believe in funding the game, I do like free from time to time. My household has probably spent $200 on Warframe in the last 4 months. Every penny was worth it and I plan on spending more.

Right now I have 16 platinum (in game currency bought with real money) and it costs 20 platinum to buy a character slot. I've made 3 extra characters I don't have slots for. Sadly, I can't play them until I spend more real money or find a person that wants to buy something I have for platinum.

You see, everything in Warframe can be made, bought, and sold by players. Anything sold for real money on Warframe market is in the game to find. Even though I'm limited slots for characters and I need platinum to open those slots, I can find a sucker player to trade something I got in game for platinum. The problem is, nobody wants what I have... Jerks! I have 2 options to play those characters I built:

1. Pay real money now
2. Delete existing characters

Obviously, option 2 is very stupid because all characters I've acquired are amazing. So the last 2 weeks I've been playing the log in roulette wheel hoping to get a platinum discount. One very addicting thing about Warframe is the daily log in rewards. You can get some awesome stuff just by logging in. For me, I need to log in once every 2 days to get what I'm looking for. I want a 20, 50, or super duper awesome 75% off platinum award which is only in the 1 to 2 day log in window. I know it's sad I don't want to pay full price for my platinum, but damn dude I've already spent $200 on yo game brah!

That all said, I'm extremely addicted to Warframe. I love their game and I love their weekly live streams. Digital Extremes is a bunch of great Canadians. We all already knew that A! I would love to thank them for making an outstanding game and constantly changing it for the better over the past 2 years. Keep up the great work I love you all.

PS- If your next Prime Access is Ash Prime with Dread Prime and Hate Prime, I'm buying the $140 package without blinking a eye!

Hype Misunderstood

When I was younger I got my wife (now ex-wife) pregnant with our first child. I remember how excited we were to have a baby. For 9 months all we could do was talk about our plans for the baby and how great we are going to be as parents. We talked about our future in great detail. Not just 9 months later or the first few years, but a lifetime of plans together with our new baby.

Some of our plans were:

1. Be Super amazing parents and nurture our child every step of the way.

2. Teach our child together with the same rules and responsibilities.

3. Love our kid and each other.

4. Send him/her to the best collage in the world.

5. Have him/her do all the sports because we have superhuman genetics.

6. He/she should win the Nobel Peace award.

7. World peace... Definitely!

8. Best kid in the world without a doubt.

9. He/she is going to make us billions! BILLIONS!!

10. I'll be surprised if the baby doesn't come out speaking with a British accent holding a martini.

For 9 months we had a perfect life. Well, except when she was in a hormonal bitch-fit. Other than that though, life was perfect. We would walk around with birds singing our names and other women would line up to touch my penis wife's belly. Damn, when is somebody going to shake the real creator of this baby?

About 2 weeks over the due date we had our first baby. Our first of 3 sons. My wife was a total ass to me in the delivery room. There was blood everywhere. I needed sleep. Her vagina was a mess. What the hell happened to the martini? The whole birthing thing did not go as planned at all. It wasn't bad, but nothing could've prepared us for it. Not even stupid books or past experience of other people. Our baby was unique in his own way coming onto the world. Unique is not perfect.

Several years after our son was born and everything on our list of hopes and dreams was burned, we decided to try again. I remember standing naked over my wife after using her like a Chucky Cheese Skeetball machine thinking to myself, "this time, this time, I must have got it in the 500 hole!"

9 more months later, I realized my wife wasn't pulling her weight in the gene pool. That is the only way to explain the messed up coding our kids were coming out with. I knew it wasn't me. I did my job. I gave a 110%. My heart sunk and my marriage fell second to trying to fix the imperfections in my kids.

Third times a charm right? Wrong! No matter how much love you put into sex, it doesn't improve the sperm or egg quality in the end. No matter how much faith you put in your hopes and dreams, things we create have a life of their own. There is only so much you can control before it starts to control you. My 3rd son made me realize it was my fault. Yes I tried my hardest, my wife did too, we were super hyped each time, we believed they were going to be perfect, but life is never perfect.

Even though I love my kids dearly, I know their faults just like I have my own. My expectations of them was as expected from a new parent. We don't create life in hopes it's mediocre, average, or even slightly above average. We create life in hopes it's the best, better than all other life, and everyone will worship what we created. Even Superman can't live up to those expectations. Our hype is misunderstood by ourselves and by others. No wonder we always feel let down and depressed by it.

There are days I just sit with my kids and think about them and what I thought they were going to be like. I think about my list and how the only problem with it was me. The feeling of creating life is intoxicating. When I made the list I was drunk on my own life not the one I created. I don't ever regret being overly hyped about having children, it was the best feeling in the world. I regret feeling disappointed by the expectations of everybody else. I should've never sought their approval and loved my kids for who they were not who society expected them to be. To this day I believe my kids are perfectly who they want to be and that's perfectly ok with me. I will love them forever.

Project Scarybooster

Yesterday, I was sitting in my Dragon Bone computer chair thinking. I've had this Thorn in my side that's been causing me Sarrow if my memory serves me right. I'm not sure because I forgot. My chair didn't help me remember, but we know the Angry Chair pisses Alice off until she throws Dirt in my eyes. Enough with these Games of Thrones, somebody is bound to get hurt or worse. I know you're on the edge of your own seat waiting to find out what Project Scarybooster is...

PROJECT SCARYBOOSTER:

As I said before, I was pissed off sitting in my uncomfortable chair waiting to die when I thought of this idea. An idea so grand I can't pull it off. Ultimately, this idea is going to fail no matter what. Obviously, I don't want it to fail because if I did I wouldn't tell you so I could fail in my head. Deep down inside me I want to do something in my life that wins me praise from my daddy. I just need a hug before I die. Project Scarybooster is that hug I sorely need. You can help me... Maybe.

The other day a friend of mine wrote a post on Facebook about how the person in front of her bought her coffee at Starbucks. Without even knowing my friend a stranger was nice enough to buy her a cup of coffee not even knowing how much she spent. That type of thing has never happened to me, you know "pay it forward". It's a karma, soul massaging, act of kindness. Even if my friend was a mass murderer, she got a free cup of coffee. How would you feel buying a murderer a $5 cup of coffee? I know, chances are my friend isn't a murderer, but she could be.

Thinking about the succulent coffee my friend got for free pissed me off more. Why don't I ever get free shit? Why am I a loser? Why did my parents chain me to the basement wall and feed me dog food for 6 years? Then all the answers came crashing down on me, I'm selfish! I expect to be handed free stuff just because I'm naturally amazing. As I get older, I'm getting uglier and people don't lick my boots anymore. I need to change my ways and do something out of the kindness of my heart.

That's where Project Scarybooster comes in. For the next couple days, weeks or hours, I'm going to search for a person I don't know. A person I've never talked to before in my life. A person that has never heard of Scarybooster (which might be really hard), and buy a game for them.

I believe I'll go to heaven for this. No... Lol. I believe I'll make someone happy for a little bit. That's good enough for me. So, let Project Scarybooster begin...

Crowfall on Kickstarter

I'm a 40 year old gamer. I've lost all faith in games and their overly hyped communities. My beloved hobby is depressing.

The older I get, the more I feel like a hermit when it comes to gaming. Even though I love playing MMOs, I want less interaction with the community. I'm not sure if it's them or me. I just don't want to deal with the people that play these games anymore.

Last night I was in a raid and the main tank started cursing at the off-tank for pulling aggro. Not just F-bombs, but C, B, S, L, M, N, O, P-bombs. All in CAPS. Was he wrong to put the off-tank in his place? No not really. Was he wrong to use the Urban Dictionary to get his point across? Yup! Nobody cares anymore, though. The gaming community is filled with people that have no understanding of empathy because there are no repercussions. Gaming and the Internet are in a sad, sad state.

Yesterday, I backed a new MMO due out in 2017ish, Crowfall. If I'm so depressed about the gaming community why did I put a new MMO to my head loaded? Crowfall is a PvP-centric game after all and that brings ALL the hateful gamers out of the woodwork. Why would I put myself through this again? Is Crowfall that awesome I can forget the pain it will being? What is wrong with me?

Sadly, I've lost my faith in game communities. It's one of the main reasons my blogging has slowed down. I'm just not passionate about writing about a subject that brings me pain. I'm sick of not having faith in my hobby. I love writing and I love the friends I've made over the years through gaming. I needed a leap of faith. I need Crowfall to catch me.

Back when I first started blogging about MMOs, the community was amazing. There were jerks, but overall people were excited to share their fun stories through blog posts. 6ish years later, most of those positive bloggers are exactly where I'm at or have given up all faith. Every year I see more and more positive bloggers quitting to get away from the hate. For some reason hate sells better and those of us that refuse to hate on our blogs, we wave the White Flag. I'm not going to give up without a fight!

Recently, a great blogger and a person I consider a good friend (through Internet proximity), quit his main gaming blog. He is an amazing writer and had the best insight into gaming, but he was a good guy. The years of hate finally crushed his shoulders and he closed down his blog. I feel for him because I want to do the same thing everyday. I've stopped posting because I keep telling myself, "what's the point?" I haven't found one yet. I really don't think Crowfall is the answer, but it's worth a try.

Let's get this clear, I'm not a fan site and I doubt I'll post anything about Crowfall this year. Well, unless I make fun of them. I'm not the guy Crowfall wants on their link-love rounds. I'm not an ass kisser. I'm not going on their forums... Ever. I'm not going to write or draw fan fiction... Ever. Shoot, I don't even kniw anything about the game except you can blow shit up. I like that. So why Crowfall?

Like I said, I need faith back into gaming and Crowfall needed my -money- faith. I'm sick of feeling down about MMOs. My writing invigorates me and I need the "Crowfall's" in my life.

Test!

Test!